Re-A-Verse-ery

Made it through to my re-a-verse-ary for straight sobriety. If you haven't eve made it this far before, it does feel good to be clean. I'm wielding the Sword as often as i have time for, and in general putting things in my life back together. Worship is worshipful again... real again... fun again. I've been to the end of the LIFE workbook which is "Sharing Your Story" so I guess it's time to continue to let the cat out of the bag, and now out of the room, and all the way out of the house, and down the street! Watch out neighbors, there's a cat on the loose!

...Of Lepers and swordsmen

I recently heard the story in Luke about the 10 lepers. The most memorable takeaway is the fact that Jesus rhetorically asks the ONLY one of 10 that came back, what happened to the other 10. After being morphed into a perfectly healed person from some hideous secluding disease to thank the one who healed him just one. I got to reading about leprosy this morning and it's not scientifically proven as to what exactly rhe disease was or if it was a collection of maladies to describe the disease. But what I saw of note is that it may have been a mold spore type of disease that would contaminate everything unless it was reacted upon and treated swiftly and severely:

"...tzaraath initially affected a person's house. If he repented (early), it required only the removal of affected stones (from the foundation or walls); if not, it required tearing down the entire house
(as the tzaraath would not go away). Then (it would spread) onto one's clothes. If he repented (or managed to rid his house of the problem), one only required washing; if not, burning all clothing was required. Then the plagues would come upon a person's body. If he repented, he underwent purification; if not, "he shall dwell alone" -- Leviticus 13:46"

To me this speaks of what I've dealt with my whole life. Unfortunately it wasn't treated sooner and I wasn't shown the way. I was never shown first hand by my parents, let alone the unsaved father, the initial source of my addiction. I think I was only a 2nd hand Son of God, because of my grandma. Over the years only a 2nd hand walk with the lord to grow in, and landed me into more serious consequences and would only culminate in a stalemate between me and God. Guess what, He always wins, but it feels great to lose! ...just realize, you're on *His* side!!! Today I experienced a moment. It was sitting on the floor with all 3 of my little ones beingkids, siblings, laughing and enjoying a moment, just plain old precious normal time... I can't do anything else to them, or their mother, or their father, myself... I've done the lone dweller thing. Despite what one might think, even though you might be "together" with some cyclical monogamy or a full blown harem of digital (albeit actual real hurting women) you can't possibly be one with anyone of them. So even in a home full of 1 or many women, or just another one every few years as you constantly blow it and leaving kids or families in your wake, you surely would "dwell alone." I can't imagine dwelling alone, and some might try and rationalize and say... I'll just find the next person to be with and not be lonely... but are you really? Do you feel alone in the universe, the grand scheme, there's got to be something more. I've found the only way out is through with supernatural assistance. Remeber the old warrior picture? It's taken all these years to realize I didn't have my sword this whole time. I had several, but they sit on the shelf gathering dust. Nothing was ever won by having only a defense. It's time to hone that rusting sword. Time to start getting used to the heft of it so you can start swingin it through some strongholds in the battle.

There's got to be a better way...

I haven't posted in a long while because work and life and schedule keeps me busy...and i HATE that. I just want to be with the wife and kids. I hope things settle down and i can get back to "normal" but I've been in my field for 10+ years and late nights and weekend work is just part of the job description. I need to have time in order to troubleshoot my problems in order to get submissions via email working, once i do, I'd like to catch up and share more when i have time but it's hard to do, i can tend to over-burden or over-commit myself because i love to say yes and not no, we shall see... Here's to nearly 2 months!

-Sh